Dunno what am i thinking….

yeah.. what day is today? yeah..is friday. so what?! So, i will see him today. i was not really OK from the morning, till when i went to city to handed in my folio to my lecturer..any way.. this is what happen today

YUP! after yesterday nite when he told me he like another gal, i was soo calm today..may be i know no hope already? but,  can you believe that?! i actually dream about him for the whole nite! OMG~! this just so shocked for me ler~! cant really remember what was the dream about.. but i remember i dream about him..

SO, when i woke up this morning.. of course i was down.. and keep thought of he liking another gal lar.. blah blah lar.. as well his scary thinking – kill himself.. so i txt may sze.. i knew that may sze muz be very annoying coz i keep repeating abous his name again and again.. (p/s: i am soo sorry lar may sze.. >_<)

anyway, talked about my feeling and thinking with may sze till she went to her exam..after i handed in my forlio.. i got lots of time before catch the bus to work.. so i went to shopped.. by myself..LOL i know.. i am lonner..any way, i bought 4 mandarin books.. FAR~!  so damn expensive.. but i guess i really need some reading after my exam.. and also to calm me down.. rite?

i bought a book named “say thanks to your enemy…” i already started read few pages when i was on the bus oh the way to my work.. this book teach us how to treat our problem as a lesson.. and learn our mistake from the problem.. and also.. we have to appreciate everything we having now..in this book talked lots of real like example, how the popular ppl became successful~ or..how are we suppose to solve our problem when we having problem… this is really a nice book..i guess is the good time to read this kind of book to made me not thinking soo much rite?  but i have to stop reading it.. coz i have another exam next thursday.. LOL have to start reading tomolo.. hehe~ ^^

any way. start worked at 4pm..got sent to checkout 12.. the most boring checkout coz this checkout kinda hiding in the corner.. not many ppl will come to this checkout if i didnt “SHOUT” at them..This checkout is close to the main entrance of the shop..SO~! when at 5pm.. i saw him walked in to the shop..

he usually started work around 7.30om –8.00pm on friday.. but dunno why today he started like 5pm.. so.. yeah.. i get too see him longer hours…this time, when i saw him.. i actually much more calm than before..i normaly will swear in my heart when i saw him.. and always try to ignore him and not to talk wtih him..

but, after what happended yesterday nite.. i actally much more calm.. dunno why.. is it becoz i know more about him.. and know he is not my cup of tea? but, so what? my feeling is hard to change.. rite? what i mean is..

i know i should stop liking him.. coz he liked another gal.
i know i should stop liking him.. coz he used to a play boy.
i know i should stop liking him.. coz he having scary thinking.

but, i need some time to stop liking him.. rite? it is normal to every one rite? if i can stop liking him straight away.. this mean that i am not “THAT” like him rite?

any way, when i put back all the credits onto the shelf.. i met him with his online shopping trolley.. we just nod our head to say hi to each other.. and then.. we didnt talked.. we act soooo awkard after yesterday..

is it bcoz the way i talked yesterday made him feel i am annoying? or did he like what xindy said before? did he found out that i like him? i dunno.. but what we act today just like the very beginning before he asked for my phone number.. just like we are these workmate that will not talk much more except said “HI”.. isnt this is what  i want? why am i feeling weird?? i guess i just need to get used to it that me and him is “normal” workmate.. rite?

may be he started work early, so.. today the whole time i worked..keep saw him walked around with his online shopping trolley.. >_< lucky i knew he like another gal already.. whenever i saw him walked passed me.. i keep told myself..”dont look at him.. “ “he like another gal already..” and got once, i actually look at him.. and when the time i look at him.. he also looked at me in the same time..>_< of course, i changed to look others place As Quick As Possible..

But when he came into espress checkout to take cigaratte.. and when he asked me where is the cigaratte.. how come i could just reply him like just normal without feeling weird.. even before yesterday.. no matter what he talked with me , i also will feel weird.. and always dunno how to answer his topic or dunno what to said.. but today.. i could just joke with him.. eventho just once..

aiyo…!
dont i told myself i need to moving on?
dont i told myself i need to stop liking him?

then what ami thinking now?! >_<